Intimacy in Marriage
I wasn’t quite sure about whether to write this, because I was afraid everyone might run a mile! But this blog is here to share what God is teaching me, and since we just studied the subject of intimacy (sexual relations) in our women’s ministry, it has been on my mind, so I went for it 🙂
From studying the chapter in The Excellent Wife, the Bible, my experience, other books, and my counselling course, I have come to a conclusion that there are a few things which are probably the most important to know and remember in this area. So here they are:
1. It is a gift from God.
When we remember that it is not something dirty, but a gift from God, we lose some of our embarrassment, see it more from God’s perspective, and are even able to pray about it!
2. It should be other-centred.
TV, films and modern thought all makes it out to be for us, for our pleasure, what we get out of it. But as Christians we need to look at it from the perspective of giving and loving the other person – which is really the path to greater joy.
3. Communication is a must!
OK so this is definitely for women. We need to communicate, as men don’t have much idea of what feels good to a woman because they are not women!
4. It is important for guarding against temptation
We need to keep intimate relations regular and continuous not only for the health and closeness of the marriage, but also to keep each other from being tempted.
For anyone struggling in this area, or just wanting to improve or learn, there is a great Christian book out there devoted to the subject, called Intended for Pleasure. Some pastors even make this mandatory reading for pre-marital counselling. The world has twisted this gift of God so much, that we really need to correct our thinking on it, and view it as God sees it.
Such a great post. Sometimes I have to remind myself about how much ‘that’ is important to a marriage. I’m a mommy, a teacher, lots of other things, but I’m also a wife…. and a woman. I let those 2 slide to the bottom sometimes and it doesn’t go well…
Thanks for this!
It is easy to forget how important it is isn’t it!
Thank you for sharing!
Joel Beeke is doing a series in his Adults Bible Class on “Intimacy in Marriage”…I have only listened to the first one, so far.
http://www.sermonaudio.com/sermoninfo.asp?SID=2412121671
This subject is sooo important to a happy marriage. Thank you for sharing these insights.
Blessings,
Charlotte
That’s great, thanks for the link Caroline!